A little art essay I had never sent

What is art to me?

Art is the essence of being for people around the world. I may not be the most artsy person who could make fine arts in a whim, but art pretty much revolves around my world. We can't really avoid art. Art is always living around us. 

For me, art is a form of therapy. Art is a place where we can truly express ourself. Art doesn't have to be real, because basically art is not supposed to be real. Art is a figment of our imagination. By art we can find our self. When we make art, we can actually see how our self is working in response to the world. We can actually see who we really are through art. 

Art is personal. It doesn't have to relate to others because it's purely made by you and mostly only for your entertainment. Art is basically how we interact as a being with the world in creation. Art is like love. You have to experience it to make it.

I've known art in a lot of form, and for me art is flexible. Because art is made by each of us uniquely (alike, sometimes) just like who we are. Art doesn't have to be pretty just like not all of us feel like one. Some art might be misleading because some people are misleading. 

Because essentially, art is us. Art is who we are in creation. And each of them are living inside of us. Art comes in various sizes to each of us. Art proves that we human exist not just by being but also by soul, by ideas and by consciousness. All we have to do is to just make it happen. 

And that, is art to me. 

holy cardigans

These days I figured I'm gonna need a new wardrobe after my birthday. You know, girly demands. And so, I tried window shopping at some malls (miserably).

I really hate window shopping on malls. Really.

Because, you'll have to swing around inside, and when you're not satisfied, you'd have to walk the walk of shame out from the shop. It doesn't. feel. good. at. all.

But you know, there's what they call online shopping. So I asked my friends the best place to online shop, and they actually said Zalora.co.id. It has the brands, the prices, and the fashion right.

Since I lacked nice cardigans (the last one I had, the buttons fell off, it was an awful feeling), I checked the cardigans section. Amazingly, they have amazing cardigans at an affordable price. And the sale! Ooh, gotta love them sales.

I'm definitely shopping here. Check them up, will you?

See you soon, loves! I'm off shopping.

please, don't say that

thank you for saying

"you're sweet"

but please,

don't say that.

such compliments could only

make me stay.

thank you for saying

"you're precious"

but please,

don't say that.

it reminds me how much

i'm a freaking lifeguard

to you.

thank you for saying

"i'm glad you're here"

but please,

don't say that.

makes it harder for me

to leave.

thank you for saying

"i. love. you"

but really,

please,

don't say that.

i'm not worthy of it

beautiful

helping

loveable

all you need to live

i'm none of the above.

i'm not your anchor and one day

i'll have to

let

g o .



so please,

don't say that.


11.8.14

Don't lie to yourself.

Last Monday I skipped school. The reason was because I was late for five minutes (which also meant: disaster's in the air), and I had been late for the last Friday, and my school is one of the best in town, so I'd need to save my face. Or so that's what I thought. 

But you know, skipping school on a very important day (Monday, hello?) meant a lot of guilt. Those guilts like "oh god, there's gonna be an exam tomorrow and there is a prep class today" and "gosh, I'm gonna miss a very important laboratory work today" totally got me. And the thought of "what should I wrote on the paper to make sure my absence was clear and not of skipping school?" was excruciatingly painful to me. 

One thing in my resolution (which had been in "copy-paste method" for years) was to never, ever, ever,  EVER, lie to anyone, no exception to myself. 

So I did something stupid. I said to myself to be sick for the day. I kept on saying those negative thoughts on my head through the day. What happened? Yes, I got a slight headache. But that's because on the whole day, I was lazily sleeping on bed. 

And after thinking A LOT about it, I found out the stupid thing: I just lied to myself by trying to convince myself with the wrong fact which was for being sick. And so I did my best to feel sick. I prayed to get sick. And that was, obviously, stupid. And do you want to know the other word for that stupidity? That is... NEGATIVE THINKING. 

Yes, negative thinking. Negative thinking is actually the point when you try to convince yourself with the lie you make up which is completely NEGATIVE than the right POSITIVE thing that is going to happen.

"But speaking about it making things work otherwise!"

Not at all. The truth is, even before you think and speak negative, it has been set that everything will be positive in their own ways. Whatever you are saying won't actually change the future. So, congratulation for lying to yourself. 

"You don't know my condition! Looking at the present fact and condition, it will be NEGATIVE!" 

Do you know the power of the words? What you say is going to be what you get. Seriously. I said I want to be sick. I got a slight headache because I had too much sleep. Do you know words will give reaction to your psychological feelings which will turn out into actions? If you think and say you can't do it, you lie. Your body react to the lie, so they make it seems as if things go worse. And then you fail. Voila! Another points for the lie you give to yourself. (And seriously, are you a psychic to know about the future?)

So today, what lies have you thought or said to yourself?

Foster is finally here!

Hi!

Sejak seminggu yang lalu aku pulang kampung ke rumah nenekku, jadi tidak sempat update.

But, Foster is finally up! And no, I'm not gonna post it here (sorry) since I found better platform to post it. Check it out on Wattpad! Plus, you can read it on mobile and get updated for any updates.

See you there soon!